The Cyber Onion

The Cyber Onion

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  • China-Linked Hackers Launch African IT Tour, Offer Free Espionage with Every Breach

    July 22, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a groundbreaking move, the elusive APT41 has decided to expand its horizons and take its talents on a tour of the African IT landscape. This fascinating group of digital mischief-makers has chosen to provide the continent’s IT services with a taste of top-tier,…

  • Genie in a VPN Bottle: Iranian Malware Grants No Wishes, Only Data Leaks

    July 22, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a move that can only be described as “VPNception,” Iranian-linked digital tricksters have managed to redefine online anonymity by ensuring everyone knows exactly what you’re doing online. Their newest concoction, the DCHSpy Android malware, is masquerading as a VPN app, proving once and…

  • AI in Zero Trust: Because Trusting Humans Worked So Well Before

    July 21, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a shocking turn of events, companies are finally realizing that maybe, just maybe, giving every employee access to sensitive data wasn’t the best idea. Enter Zero Trust, the fancy framework designed to ensure everyone feels like they’re working in a digital Fort Knox.…

  • HPE Outsources Security to Most Trustworthy Entity: The Hacker Community

    July 21, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a groundbreaking security initiative, Hewlett-Packard Enterprise has decided to redefine the term ‘open source’ by hard-coding login credentials directly into their Instant On devices. By doing so, they open the digital doors to the world’s most exclusive cybersecurity conference: your local coffee shop’s…

  • PoisonSeed Hackers: Because Two-Factor Wasn’t Hard Enough

    July 21, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In today’s episode of ‘Why We Can’t Have Nice Things,’ PoisonSeed hackers have effortlessly side-stepped FIDO keys, proving yet again that security is only as strong as the weakest click-happy user. It seems that these digital bandits have cleverly turned QR codes into their…

  • China’s New Phone App: Privacy Theft Now Available in Bulk!

    July 20, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In an unprecedented move, China’s law enforcement has decided to make privacy invasion as seamless as possible with their new app, Massistant. It’s like having your own dedicated, albeit slightly intrusive, stalker — now available in handy app form! Developed by the ever-resourceful SDIC…

  • Cyber Group Discovers Revolutionary Use for LNK Files: Hackers and Grandmas Rejoice!

    July 19, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a daring move that has brought together cybercriminals and tech-challenged grandparents, the notorious UNG0002 group has revolutionized the use of LNK files. While your grandma uses them to clutter her desktop with shortcuts to ‘THE INTERNET’, hackers have discovered they also double as…

  • Hackers Finally Figure Out Ivanti Zero-Days Aren’t Just Zero-Calorie Desserts

    July 19, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a shocking turn of events, cybercriminals have discovered that vulnerabilities in Ivanti Connect Secure (ICS) are not just fancy tech jargon for guilt-free snacks. Instead, they are pathways to unleash havoc, much to the confusion of everyone who assumed it was a diet…

  • Hackers Confuse Apache with Wallet: Mining Cryptocurrency with Web Servers

    July 17, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In yet another display of their professional prowess, hackers have decided to solve the age-old problem of ‘How does one mine for crypto without paying for electricity?’ Answering it with a masterful stroke of ingenuity, they’ve started using Apache HTTP servers. Because, why not?…

  • Cobalt Strike: The Avant-Garde Art Movement in Cyber Espionage

    July 17, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a groundbreaking revelation, Chinese hackers have redefined what it means to be a cutting-edge cybercriminal. Eschewing the traditional, ‘boring’ methods of digital thievery, they’ve embraced the modernist techniques of spear-phishing with a twist of Cobalt Strike and custom backdoors. It’s like Picasso, but…

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