The Cyber Onion

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  • X Users Urged to Re-Enroll Keys: A Fun New Annual Tradition!

    October 28, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a bold move to spice up their users’ lives, social media platform X has announced a new annual tradition: re-enrolling security keys just in time to ruin your pre-holiday relaxation. The company’s latest play for your undivided attention involves requiring loyal participants in…

  • Cybersecurity: Where Hackers Outperform Updates and Trust is Just Malware Bait

    October 27, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a shocking turn of events, the WSUS, long hailed for its ability to provide security updates to Windows systems, was exploited by an unknown group of hackers who were apparently very unimpressed by Microsoft’s patch management strategy. When reached for comment, the attackers…

  • New ChatGPT Flaw: Hackers and AI Join Forces for World Domination

    October 27, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In an unexpected plot twist, the ChatGPT Atlas browser—better known for helping users find vegan recipes and cat jokes—has unwittingly become the latest member of a global hacker coalition. Yes, the AI that was once just your friendly neighborhood trivia-night partner is now reportedly…

  • Ransomware Group Qilin Goes Green with Eco-Friendly Hybrid Attacks

    October 27, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a stunning move towards sustainability, the ransomware group known as Qilin has introduced their eco-friendly hybrid malware attack, seamlessly blending Linux payloads with a BYOVD (Bring Your Own Vulnerability Day) exploit. This groundbreaking initiative is expected to earn them a nomination for the…

  • 194,000 Domains: Smishing So Popular They’re Practically Giving URLs Away

    October 26, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In what can only be described as the digital equivalent of a buy-one-get-one-free sale, a band of cyber tricksters has managed to hoard over 194,000 malicious domains. This is essentially the Costco of cybercrime, where hackers roam free like kids in a candy store,…

  • APT36’s DeskRAT: When Malware Goes Golang, Hackers Go Westworld

    October 24, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. Move over, Netflix — the trending series of 2025 is DeskRAT: Cyber Thrills Edition! In a stunning plot twist, Transparent Tribe, also known as APT36, has ditched their old-school hacking methods for the cutting-edge allure of Golang-based malware. Experts are convinced that if HBO’s…

  • Hackers Confuse YouTubers by Uploading Videos with Real Content for Once

    October 24, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a groundbreaking operation that would make even Dr. Evil blush, a vast network of nefarious YouTube accounts has been discovered sharing videos filled with malicious intent rather than harmless cat compilations and makeup tutorials. These cyber villains dared to misuse the cherished trust…

  • North Korean Hackers Post Jobs, Forget to Offer Free Lunch and Stock Options

    October 24, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a groundbreaking strategy fit for a 90s sitcom, North Korean hackers have taken up the role of casting agents in a never-ending rerun of ‘Operation Dream Job.’ Their latest target? Unsuspecting European defense engineers who might just find a job offer in their…

  • Jingle Thief Hackers Swipe Christmas Joy; Santa in Talks with Cybersecurity Experts

    October 23, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a cybercrime caper that would make Ebenezer Scrooge proud, a group of hackers known as ‘Jingle Thief’ has allegedly stolen more holiday cheer than a Grinch with a vendetta. It turns out that when they weren’t busy concocting questionable cookie recipes, these hackers…

  • Companies Ditch Static Secrets, But Only After Breaking 1000s of Developer Hearts

    October 23, 2025
    Uncategorized

    🚨 Fake Cyber Onion Ad: Hackers hate this one weird trick. In a heartfelt move that left countless developers clutching their keyboards, companies are finally abandoning static secrets in favor of managed identities. After all, nothing says ‘innovative’ quite like realizing that 1995’s best security practices may have a few flaws. But don’t worry, the…

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