In a world where speed is king, slow and steady wins the breach. Imagine a utopia where cyber threats are detected only when they politely announce themselves with a two-week notice, like courteous house guests. That’s right, folks—forget about early detection because truly successful businesses know that a leisurely discovery of threats is key to long-term tranquility.

Who needs rapid response teams when you can meditate through a crisis instead? After all, nothing screams ‘resilient business model’ like embracing each data breach as an opportunity for personal growth. It’s not about protecting revenue; it’s about serenely watching it float away like a zen river of encrypted chaos.

Some might call it risky, but those people probably still use anti-virus software. The real visionaries understand that threat detection at the pace of a sloth is not just a strategy; it’s a lifestyle. Why rush to secure defenses today when you can ponder the philosophical implications of tomorrow’s cyber attacks?