Ah, penetration testing, the delightful art of paying someone to pick all the locks to your digital fortress—legally! Why invest in real security when you can just keep shelling out money to have someone tell you exactly how you’re about to be hacked again next month? It’s like getting a weather forecast that insists it’s always going to rain inside your house.

But let’s be honest, the standard approach to pen testing is as flexible as a concrete block. Sure, it might be costly, cumbersome, and cookie-cutter, but it offers the unparalleled thrill of watching your IT budget vanish without leaving a trace. Who needs tailored solutions when you can have the same pen test report as everyone else, with just your company name scribbled in at the top?

And what about those ‘white hat’ hackers, you ask? They’re the virtuous cyber wizards who break into your system using the same tactics as the bad guys—except with permission and a really lucrative contract. So next time you’re admiring your empty coffers post-pen test, remember: you’re not just paying for security insights, you’re funding a high-stakes game of ‘Where Did Our Budget Go?’