Managed Service Providers (MSPs) have finally unlocked the secret to turning cybersecurity into a mystical growth potion. The recipe involves a dash of fear, a sprinkle of compliance jargon, and a heavy dollop of clueless client expectations. It’s a dish best served with a side of bewildering buzzwords, ensuring even the most unpalatable data breaches taste like success.

Clients today yearn for comprehensive protection, much like toddlers demanding candy for breakfast, without the inconvenience of adulting in the world of cyber management. MSPs step in heroically, offering a menu of security layers as nutritious as air sandwiches, guaranteed to keep those frightening cyber-monsters at bay. Or at least until the next major breach, when it’s time to refresh the sales pitch – err, menu.

With regulatory demands evolving faster than a social media scandal, MSPs are dancing the compliance cha-cha: two steps forward, one step back, and a few side hustles to keep the illusion vibrant. Meanwhile, as the threat landscape becomes a tangled mess of cat memes and phishing scams, MSPs reassure clients with the comforting promise that their security will grow, right alongside the threats – and the invoices.