In a dazzling show of cybersecurity excellence, Dutch authorities have confirmed that hackers gained access to their ‘super exclusive’ member-only club: employee contact data. The Council for the Judiciary and Dutch Data Protection Authority (AP) announced, with an admirable level of reluctance, that their systems had fallen victim to a zero-day exploit on Ivanti Endpoint Manager Mobile (EPMM). They even sent a cute little note of surprise to their parliament.

The breach has been described as ‘unprecedented’—a word here used to mean, ‘Oops, they did it again!’ The Ivanti zero-day exploit has become the latest must-have accessory for hackers this season, making last week’s exploits seem as outdated as Windows XP.

In response, the National Cyber Security Center was quick to take action, maybe by loudly sighing and shaking their heads in disappointment. Meanwhile, employees have been left feeling like celebrities, their contact information dispersed more rapidly than the latest viral TikTok dance.