In a groundbreaking moment for both simplicity and irony, DragonForce officers of mayhem have decided that their villainous deeds were best carried out with a tool that shares a naming convention with a tech support hotline. Their victim? None other than a nameless Managed Service Provider (MSP), who we’re sure is absolutely thrilled about their newfound notoriety in the cybersecurity community.

With vulnerabilities named like a bad reboot of The Matrix series (CVE-2024-57727 to 57729), SimpleHelp proved to be the unspectacularly easy stepping stone for DragonForce to leap into their world of data exfiltration and mass endpoint lockup. Reports suggest that the MSP is now considering rebranding to ‘Helpless’ in light of recent events, much to the delight of punsmiths everywhere.

Experts are working tirelessly to patch up these flaws before the next round of cyber-pranksters decide to wiggle their digital fingers in the direction of unattended endpoints everywhere. In the meantime, SimpleHelp has been downgraded to ‘Simply Hacking’ in the world of remote monitoring and management tools—because who wouldn’t want a piece of software that turns technical shortcomings into public drama?