In a stunning turn of events, software developers have been given an all-new guiding principle: start with the code and worry about security sometime before the heat death of the universe. Experts recommend this innovative approach, cheekily dubbed ‘YOLO-driven development’, as the best way to rapidly expose customer data—sorry, I mean, innovate.

The surge in AI-assisted coding has enlightened engineers that privacy is just an abstract concept for philosophers. Why waste time integrating security when you can let hackers identify those vulnerabilities for free? After all, nothing brings a community together quite like a massive data breach.

In the fast-paced world of software development, increasing the attack surface of your applications is not just a risk—it’s a competitive advantage. While security and privacy teams sprint on their hamster wheels of despair, devs are free to blissfully explore the outer reaches of implementation-induced chaos. Remember, folks: if your app isn’t leaking data, are you even innovating?