In a historic milestone for mediocrity, the npm registry celebrated an unprecedented influx of fake packages, redefining the art of digital clutter. Cybersecurity researchers, sporting bemused grins, reported the internet’s newest viral sensation: a worm-like spam attack that would leave even the most organized app developer questioning their life choices.

‘We’ve reached peak chaos,’ announced a bewildered cybersecurity expert, admiring the tenacity in the stupidity of these packages. ‘It’s like Marie Kondo met a hacker, and she lost.’

The npm registry, known for its vibrant ecosystem, now boasts a record collection of pristine junk. The registry’s spokesperson, fighting back laughter, stated, ‘We always wanted to be number one at something. We just didn’t think it would be this.’