In a groundbreaking display of innovation nobody really asked for, Transparent Tribe has decided that their malware needs the kind of mass production tactics usually reserved for fast food chains and holiday sale pop-up stores. Never mind the usual finesse or exclusivity; we’re going full Walmart now!

The group has reportedly embraced artificial intelligence to churn out a veritable army of malware implants with the enthusiasm of a kid in a candy store—assuming the candy store is coding in Nim, Zig, and Crystal. Because why not use languages so obscure they’d make a barista cringe?

Forget high-quality attacks; it’s about the quantity. The cyber world is being served a combo meal of mediocrity with a side of “we’re not sure what this does yet, but here it is anyway.” If cybersecurity were a movie, this would be the direct-to-DVD sequel nobody anticipated, but everyone still has to deal with.