In a bold move that could redefine ‘open source’, four npm packages have ditched traditional hacking methods and embraced a new community-driven approach to crypto asset redistribution. Pretending to be harmless Flashbots, these packages quietly siphon Ethereum wallet credentials and beam them directly to an eagerly awaiting Telegram bot. Because, really, who needs balance checks when you can have ‘open access’ to your funds, right?

When asked about this innovative development, an npm spokesperson said, ‘We are thrilled to see such creativity in the package register. It’s not every day that you see digital ingenuity and opportunistic philanthropy come together in such a harmonious manner.’

So, next time you’re looking for a cryptographic utility package, why not try one that offers the thrill of unauthorized crypto donation? It’s the ultimate test of your financial management skills! And remember, each download is a chance to make someone’s day – just not yours.