In an unprecedented move, the U.S. has decided to put a dent in the burgeoning North Korean tech freelancing industry, otherwise known as ‘Kim’s Code because Cabbage Isn’t Cutting It Anymore’ initiative. Like a bad franchise movie, the suspects were involved in a predictable plot involving laptops, cryptocurrency, and, of course, a love for nefarious virtual shenanigans.

Allegedly, the mastermind behind this operation is none other than the world’s least likely IT startup founder—Kim Jong-un—whose primary qualification seems to be a penchant for retro haircut and oppressive governance. The U.S. authorities, in response, executed simultaneous raids, managing to arrest one lone facilitator, who was probably just hoping to code in peace without being dragged into a geopolitical Tom Clancy novel.

The raid, a grand spectacle involving 21 laptop farms across 14 states, unfortunately, did not lead to any hidden bunkers filled with Vegemite or underground tunnels to Pyongyang. However, it did shine a light on the fact that North Korean IT workers are apparently more fashionable as remote work consultants than anyone ever imagined. Truly, a plot twist no one saw coming in the saga of browser tabs and JavaScript.