In a stunning display of cyber choreography, hackers worldwide have mistaken the MOVEit Transfer system for the latest TikTok dance challenge. Armed with digital tutus and zero-day exploits, these cyber swashbucklers have launched what experts are calling the largest synchronized cyber flash mob in history. Who knew patching could be this rhythmic?

According to the renowned threat intelligence firm GreyNoise—who apparently doubles as the NSA’s hip DJ—there’s been a ‘notable surge’ in scanning activity. Experts speculate that this might be a desperate attempt by hackers to find out which systems are still stuck in 2025 without the latest antivirus software or the knowledge that ‘floppy disks’ are not a type of hat.

MOVEit Transfer is a managed file transfer solution, a term which is tech speak for ‘fancy USB stick replacement used by bureaucrats and businesses to share sensitive data without accidentally uploading it to MySpace.’ Once again, in the relentless quest for spicy emails and vanilla corporate secrets, these digital miscreants prove that while they may be socially distanced, they’re still eager for a little virtual chaos cabaret.