In an inspiring display of how not to handle sensitive information, former CIA analyst Asif William Rahman has managed to turn what most call a ‘career-ending mistake’ into a ‘daring experiment in transparency.’ Rahman, who apparently skimmed every spy movie script but none of the agency’s guidelines, has been sentenced to a refreshingly brief 37 months for sharing top secret National Defense Information with anyone who seemed even mildly interested.

Prosecutors argued that Rahman’s definition of ‘Need to Know’ was more liberal than a college philosophy class. In his own defense, Rahman reportedly claimed he was simply trying to ‘democratize intelligence,’ a bold strategy clearly not aligning with CIA’s cherished principles of mystery and paranoia.

Now facing the harsh reality of prison life, Rahman will have plenty of time to contemplate the finer points of confidentiality versus casual sharing. As he embarks on this 37-month reflection retreat, one can only hope he’ll finally distinguish classified documents from bedtime reading. Who knows, maybe he’ll even write a thriller about it – just as long as he forgets to send anyone a copy.